Throw away your pro/con list

Welcome to the Decision Navigator!

Each Friday, you’ll receive one reflection to Anchor the soul, one insight to Discern with wisdom, and one micro-action to Decide and move in faith. My hope is simple: that this rhythm helps you live a freer, fuller, more intentional life shaped by bolder, faster, more faithful decisions.

It's a trap!

We couldn’t design a worse tool for decision-making than the pro/con list.

It is the default move for almost everyone. We draw a line down the center of the page. We list the good stuff on the left and the bad stuff on the right. Then we try to see which side is heavier.

But it is a trap.

The pro/con list puts options before clarity. It skips the criteria phase completely. It flattens the discussion and distracts us from what actually matters.

If you go to an AI tool right now and ask for help with a decision, it will likely do the same thing. It will rush to a recommendation or generate a list for you. AI mimics human nature, and right now, human nature is in a rush to resolve uncertainty.

We are so anxious to “get to the answer” that we sprint past the wisdom.

Here is how to slow down just enough to get it right.

⚓ ANCHOR — The Heart

Constraints create freedom

The reason we rush to the pro/con list is that we hate the feeling of the “open loop.” We want to close it.

But before you weigh your options, you must Anchor in your reality. You need to define your deal-breakers.

Most of us assume we are trapped by constraints that don’t exist. We think “I have to stay in this city” or “I can’t take a pay cut.” But when you pause to list your actual non-negotiables, you often realize you have far more freedom than you thought.

🧠 DISCERN — The Head

The trap is "Narrow Framing."

In their book Decisive, Chip and Dan Heath identify “Narrow Framing” as a top villain in decision-making. We trap ourselves in a binary choice: Should I do this OR that?

The moment you frame a decision as “A vs. B,” you lose 50% of your intelligence.

The goal of the Discern phase is to Widen the Options.

Never settle for two choices. Always force a Third Way.

1. The Status Quo: What happens if we change nothing?
2. The Pivot: The new option you are stressing about.
3. The Third Way or the Wildcard: The creative option you haven’t looked for yet.

Often, but not always, the Third Way is a blend. It’s “Do the pivot, but only as a 20% experiment.”

But if you really want to take it to the next level introduce something unexpected and previously unconsidered--maybe something that is now possible once you removed those unnecessary constraints.

↔️ DECIDE — The Hands

One Small Step...

Take one decision you are wrestling with right now—specifically one that is a “Should I __?” question.

Do not ask an AI to solve it for you. This is your life. You need to maintain agency over the ends you design.

Instead, write down your three paths:

1. Status Quo:
2. The Pivot:
3. The Third Way or Wildcard:

Just spelling out that third option usually breaks the deadlock.

Note: If you feel really compelled to use AI, use it here at the widening options phase. Just be sure to tell it what you are doing and why.

That's it for this week. Navigate your life. Don’t just compute it.

With peace and purpose,

Andy

If this was helpful, forward it to someone who’s suffering from indecision or trying to navigate big decisions better.

Want to go deeper? Explore the archive →​

Want a template to help you implement my suggestions? Download my Decision Canvas →​

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